Endo apt. today...

It's crazy to think that my first 13 years living with diabetes I freaked out when I went to my every 3 month endo apts. Sometimes I would "forget" to bring my meter, sometimes I would religiously write blood sugars in a brand new log book, a few months of BS within 30 minutes, and sometimes my heart would race so much they often thought I had high blood pressure. I hate being held accountable by a doctor who really doesn't understand the emotional side of living with diabetes, someone who just doesn't get IT. The tables turned two years ago when I saw my doctor care about me enough to encourage me to change my life. I had really turned my back to my diabetes and during my first year of teaching it all came crashing down on me rather quickly. It was about this time two years ago when I decided to take a medical leave of absence from my teaching job to focus on myself and the advice my doctor gave me was the best advice ever. I now see her as one of my teammates, coaching me on the side and encouraging me when I need to be encouraged.

I know, this is going to sound crazy, but now I actually look forward to my appointments with her. I really respect her and at this point in my life, I feel like I can take charge of the appointments and set the agenda rather than get yelled at. It's a refreshing change of pace and today I'm looking forward to seeing her again and sharing with her some of the great things I learned at DTC and telling her how DTC filled the void in my life I needed filled. Today I seem to have less questions written down than most appointments and I feel a little more at peace. My 7 day average is 124, 14 day average is 142, and 30 day average is 147 and my sensor data agrees as well. I'm looking forward to seeing where my A1c is today and mapping out my journey of what I will need to do to achieve my DTC goal of less than 6.5%. Will I tear myself apart if it isn't there yet? No, I can't...I can only react and ask myself what changes I can make to get closer to that goal!